Recent studies have shown that 34 to 40% of women suffer from a a low level of desire for intimacy. A lack of intimacy affects every level of the relationship and can create communication problems and distance between the partners.
What if the truth is that women simply need to be understood as being different from men? Most women desire to be both aroused and relaxed before any intimacy starts. They desire to truly feel “in the mood” to really enjoy it. Anything less is just going through the motions and the intense level of pleasure that can be shared together is lost.
Acknowledging that the issue exists and is negatively affecting a relationship is a step in the right direction. Having open communication is a major key to taking on any problem or issue that arises within a relationship. We need to realize that as we age and grow within a relationship we evolve as a couple. Work, kids and stress can all be factors in the decrease of desire for intimacy that many women experience.
If you look at the solutions that are offered in the form of pills, creams and toys, you will quickly see that they are not long term answers. These stop gap solutions do nothing to deal with the underlying cause of the drop in interest.
Therapists and counselors can aid in helping couples communicate their needs openly, but they are too costly and time consuming for many couples in today’s economy.
An easy and inexpensive way that has helped many couples through this issue is the use of written erotic literature. Fantasies are an excellent means of stimulation for most women. Men tend to be aroused by visual cues. Women as a rule enjoy a more romantic plot driven fantasy.
The mental exercise of reading the fantasy and experiencing the emotional value that is attached to it will create a state of arousal in most women.
Most women would never consider fantasies as a possible solution to their problem. To admit that thinking and fantasizing about sex arouses them can be embarrassing.
To compound the problem, the majority of content that is accessible on the internet is hidden in websites that may contain objectionable content or material that is far outside of most women’s comfort zone. This makes the web an undesirable location for the majority of women to locate answers of any kind.
Romance novels have a ton of content, but getting to the parts that actually provoke the arousal women are seeking is tedious. Today’s women are busy and as such the majority of romance novels are inconvenient as a source of arousal.
When women find the proper erotic literature material for themselves, they realize that the state of arousal begins inside the mind. This arouses the emotional and physical state. The outcome can be very enjoyable for everyone involved.
Fantasies are not the only key to creating an environment that women find arousing. Their partners can learn methods to stimulate a woman prior to any contact starting. The method used really depends upon the individual woman and what she decides is stimulating. Making an effort to create a more romantic feeling between partners can be as simple as calling her on the phone just to say how wonderful she is.
The first step is open communication between partners. Women need to explore solutions that feel good to them and men need to realize that there are efforts that they can make to enhance the relationship. With some consideration you will find that it is not difficult to rediscover the sparks that brought you together in the first place.
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